The story I chose was when I was young and had a nightmare after I watched a scary movie.It was traumatic and I remember it vividly so I decided to compose my piece accordingly. I chose Helvetica to give a strong rigid effect. The feeling needs to be dream like and lots of movement. The difference between the two is that the first is not as fluid. The part I'm stuck is where the letters float up and come down, it's not as cohesive as I'd like.
For my first second rough I chose Baskerville with a serif to add some edge and mood to the image. The feeling needs to come across as raw and unrefined yet dream like. I want it to be surreal with a lack of time and a split composition. The difference between the first and second rough is the first is more intense with more detail to direct the viewers attention from the bottom left to the top left briefly stopping at the bed which is the combining factor.
Both pieces have different strong points and parts that need work. In your first image, you say that you do not like the way that the drifting words flow. Maybe you could try varying the size of the individual letters, rather than scaling the words as a whole. This way, as the letters hit the curve, it would become bigger and seem to flow more. Or perhaps, do not leave all the words on an exact line. Have the words floating freely into the curve; it will not seem so linear, especially with the ‘falling.’ Other than that, I believe the image works great and the idea is clear. The second image is much more expressive than the first and I like how much more dreamlike it feels. I think that in the dream bubble, you should try flipping the ‘a’ in nightmare around because I did not read it as nightmare initially. The font is a great choice for the piece and you utilized it well. I think that both of these pieces will work for your final; it really all depends on which one you like more and that you believe better depicts the experience for you.
ReplyDeleteMy initial thought is that I definitely prefer the second piece. I do have to agree that the backwards “a” is throwing me off a little but the dream cloud is quite impressive. The texture around the edges looks very realistic. The large black box also ads to the dark/scary side of the piece and supports the overall theme of a nightmare. I do feel like the bed is taking away from piece seeing how realistic the cloud looks. Two things you might consider are spending more time on the bed and maybe see how the piece looks with the black box pulled down all the way. Also, for some reason, my eye is drawn to the apple hiding behind the “o” in Movie. I’m not too sure what purpose that serves.
ReplyDeleteThe only thing really saying nightmare to me in the first one is the large text in the bottom. I do think the way it’s kerned and the way the white letters interact with rest of the white space work well, but the rest of the composition isn’t quite coming across to me. It looks like an “&” or a treble clef. Perhaps you can incorporate the “NIGHTMARE” of this one into your other piece.