This composition is meant to portray how much I think. Throughout my day I am constantly lost inside my own thoughts. I chose Garamond for this because it's my favorite font and I like the variety it has between faces. I'm not sure if there should be that many i's, maybe less and bigger, or more and smaller, or any combination of that.
This composition is meant to convey a very loose feeling, almost a lost feeling, even. I chose the typeface Bodoni (Bauer, STD 1) Italic, because of the light and curvy feel it has. I'm not sure if this is the best way to place the text; maybe they should just be floating around randomly on the page.Both of these roughs are similar in that they don't give specifics about my day; rather, both revolve around how it is in my head, more or less. The difference between the two is that the first explains how I constantly think, and uses repetition, while the second indirectly describes how I feel and is very simple. Another difference is that the former is solid while the latter is light/loose.
Victorio, I think you should go with the 1st composition rather than the second. The first one is stronger and has more of an impact on the viewer. I like the typeface used and how you use different varieties of the font. I think the emphasis on certain words allows the viewer to get a general idea of the composition, and brings their eye to certain places in the composition, ex. the word “think”. I like the idea of the light bulb but I would make a few changes. I think you should lengthen the light bulb and not make it so short and round. A normal light bulb is a bit thinner so I think making it thinner will allow the viewer to see the light bulb easier. Also, with the italic I’s, I would decrease the amount, to make it look more like the light bulb is giving off light. Right now it looks a bit like an outline, or hair around someone’s head. I like the idea of you second composition but the first one is definitely the best. Hope this helps.
ReplyDeleteI like both of these for there expressiveness. The light bulb is composed nicely. I keep thinking that I want to see a base on the bottom of the light bulb to represent the metal part of a light bulb. I was thinking that you could just bold the word stops and make it larger? Everything else is nice as it stands…oooo, try doing it white lettering on a black background; then it would look lit! Maybe balance the bold letters to the left a bit too, like bold “God, sometimes, or subjects.
ReplyDeleteI can’t deny, I like the other one a lot too, there is less going on, but that seems to be the idea. The only word that I may work with on that one is the word lately, if feels heavier, and doesn’t have as much movement. I still say go with the light bulb. It has stronger legs to stand on for this project.
The light bulb idea is great. I like the rays. I enjoy the way it immediately looks like a light bulb. I think the I s could be bigger and less of them. I like how you pulled the word think and idea out of the design with the size of it. It works really well and conveys how you’re always thinking. It looks great on the inside except for some spacing issues between the lines of type. Try to fill in those spaces, maybe with really small type.
ReplyDeleteI love the second design and how airy it is. It is literally floating. It’s very minimal but with a reason. I like that they are all floating a direction and not random. I think that works well with your design and communicates randomness even though it’s not random. The direction their all moving is making them floats more than if they were random.
My favorite is the first design because the light bulb communicates your day so well.
First comp: great concept! And good choice of font. Overall the image looks great, but I do have a few suggestions. This may involve having to change the font, but I think the letter I around the light bulb would look better if you took off the italics and possibly flipped a few around to look like exclamation points. There seem to be an inconsistency between lines, was that intentional? If not, I would try filling those in a bit more.
ReplyDeleteSecond comp: love the simplicity. It reminds me of those days that you just spend lounging at the park flying kites. I like the aloofness. I think you could take that even a bit further. Play with other fonts, strokes, placement of letter etc.
Overall, your first comp is much stronger. Though, the second has potential too. I would work on both regardless of what you choose to turn in for your final.
Ok, I really like how each of these is interesting, with so many differences. I can honestly say that this is my first project to look at and not have a favorite, and you are number 8 in my critique list. I don’t know what that means, but I think you have some epic decision making to get to.
ReplyDeleteThe light bulb idea is great, and I especially like the little i beams. The way the text is kerned is pretty good, I feel. I think you hit the spot when it comes to bold vs non bold font as well.
The second one is just… really simple and concise. I really don’t know what to say other than I’d just leave it as it is. The magic is there.
Inventor or Wizard, you choose?
First Rough: Great concept! I really like the way that you went with this one.The shape needs to be tweaked a little and I think it would be neat to darken the words where the threads run around it at the bottom other than that – I think you really have something with this one.
ReplyDeleteSecond Rough: This is also a good concept. Your use of type and placement are very good here. I really hope you add a little more type swirling around in there otherwise it just looks like too much empty space.
Both concepts are very good but your strongest is your first one. I look forward to seeing how it turns out!
the first rough is just beautiful and i think you should go with that one. the light bulb is rendered excellently. it looks like something you would see on magazine somewhere. the light bulb repersents ideas and how the human mind works. maybe make the "i" a little smaller and also darken slightly some of the text in the middle. i dont rly get the second piece. the shape of the text is nice, but there is to much white space and the txt gets lots because it is to small. the text works well, but if you want to continue working this one, make the text bigger and maybe try to shape into the form of something.
ReplyDeleteThe bulb is a great comp. It is treated very delicately and not heavy handed. My only problem with it is the way the bulb is depicted. It seems abnormally shaped. Have more of a base and thin out the bulb. Not so many "i"s around the bulb. about half as much
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